Thursday, February 21, 2008

Beer Drinker's Guide to Colorado

Say you're tooling around the great outdoors... specifically, you're out in the hinterlands of the awe inspiring Rocky Mountains of Colorado. Say you get a hankerin' for some of the hoppily righteous brew that bubbles forth from the #1 beer producing state in these here United States of America. Take that California and Oregon! HA!

But wait... you don't know where to find such a place to quench what has now become a beast of a thirst! Your cellphone has no bars (I'd like to see the Verizon dude do a commercial out there!) and your Blackberry stopped pickin' (get it, pickin'... berries - work with me people!) up a signal at the last "y" in the road. You know there's a hoary host of hoppiness somewhere out here where the buffalo roam and the deer and antelope play! But where!?! WHEEEEEERE!?!?!

Only if you had a map...

A map that would guide your hop lovin' ass straight to the nearest brewery, brewpub or historic tavern. YES! That would be splendiferous. But... is there such a thing Mad Beer Man? Why, yes there is my young beery padawan.

The folks at the Beer Drinker's Guide to Colorado have you covered. This thing - this invaluable navigational tool they call the Great Beer Map - is something every Colorado Beer Geek needs to have tucked away in their backpack or glove box. It will save you from the Parched Throat Effect of high-altitude discombobulation, and help quench the beastly thirst monster that is known to attack the unprepared.

It is chock full of things you need (or at least want) to know. Where to get the brew, how long it will take to get to the brew, what type of brew (complete with a beer tree - sweet!) you might want to get once you get to where you want to go... photos, charts, diagrams - the list goes on! And once you get to where you're going, you'll want to take it inside with you. It's one helluva conversation starter sure to create envy in those Beer Geeks without such a magnificent tool. Trust me...

I've seen one. I have one. It is a thing of beauty. It is a font of knowledge. It's the Swiss-Army Knife of maps! It does everything but actually pour the beer into your mug. You need it, you want it, so get it. Now. It even comes in three fabulous flavors - folded ($12.95) for tight spots, rolled ($12.95) for the wall (I just ordered one to put up in my beer room) and for those who perspire too much, have overly active saliva glands, or just can't keep the beer in the container - they even have a rolled laminated version! Click on over to the Beer Drinker's Guide to Colorado site, which in and of itself is a fantastic keg of beery goodness, and order one now.

You wouldn't leave home without your driver's license, right? Why leave home without such an amazing, one of a kind tool like the Great Beer Map? Ya... you wouldn't.